It’s December. That time of year again: Trimming the tree. Buying gifts. And debating if “Die Hard” really IS a Christmas movie. (I’m in the “yes,” camp, but you probably already knew that.) But whether you’re the type who binges through the Hallmark channel during all of December (no judgement), or you consider “Gremlins” to be the perfect holiday movie and once had a cat named Gizmo (guilty on both counts), we’re going a darker route in this post…
A few years back, I learned of this sketchy character named Krampus. In European folklore, he’s literally Kris Kringle’s evil other half. On Christmas (or “Krampus Nacht“), while Kringle is rewarding the good kids, Krampus is punishing them, eating them, or just dragging them away.This takes the whole “so you better be good for goodness sake” motif to a whole new level. I love a good monster story, so I wrote “The Krampus Comes Out Tonight” and released it on my “Lump of Coal” EP. (It’s available on iTunes…hint, hint.)
Krampus has eased his way into western pop culture in the past few years: Christmas cards. An episode of “Grim“. Even a musical piece on “Family Guy”. He’s also been on the big screen. A cursory search on “Krampus” in IMDB pulls up more than a couple of horror efforts. Here are three that are worth your while:
“Krampus” (2015). This is the biggest-budget appearance of our favorite Christmas demon and the one film in this list you’ve likely heard of. Directed by Michael Dougherty (who also helmed the fun Halloween anthology “Trick R Treat”), this stars Santa Cruz native Adam Scott and Toni Collette. Their kids inadvertently summon the big K who wreaks havoc and murder, with the help of demonic gingerbread men and some other iconic Christmas paraphernalia who become animated and turn to the dark side. It’s very “Gremlins”-like, with a mix of dark humor and comedy. And with plenty of room for a sequel. We’re waiting…
“Slay Belles” (2018). This brand-new, straight to streaming release is the tongue-in-cheek debut of “Spooky Dan Walker”. Talk of this film came out when I was finishing the Krampus song for my holiday release, so I’ve been eagerly awaiting this one: Three young “Adventure Girls” visit abandoned amusement parks and the like decked out cosplay garb, and recording their antics for a show on YouTube. In this outing, they break into the abandoned “Santa Land” – which for you locals, looks much like our own Santa’s Village in Scotts Valley did after its heyday in the 60s and 70s. (Trivia: There were several Santa Claus-themed parks like this, a few that are still up and running. Weird idea. Go figure.)
In Santa Land, the three young women find an old caretaker who looks like an old biker and is actually the real (and forgotten, no-longer-needed) Santa Claus. Played by Barry Bostwick – Brad from “The Rocky Horror Picture Show!!!” – his grizzled Santa Claus turns out to have a bond with Krampus, which keeps him almost restrained. The locals think a bear is attacking youngsters. We know better, and the Adventure Girls quickly learn as well, as they team up with Santa. “Slay Belles” is low-budget, but with a lot of heart, humor, and some really clever twists on the Santa-Krampus mythology. I was happy to pay the streaming fee to support the film. Really looking forward to see what Spooky Dan Walker and his Adventure Girls might come up with next.
“A Christmas Horror Story” (2015). This is another of those horror anthologies, which is way more hit than miss. Four rotating stories with a slumming William Shatner as a DJ (shades of Adrienne Barbeau in “The Fog”) all with a Christmas theme. Besides, Krampus, two words make this worth seeing: Zombie elves!!! Need I say anything else?
Besides the elves – zombie elves!!! – there’s a ghost story, a changeling demon released from a Christmas tree, a few red herrings, and of course, misbehaving children who inevitably summon Krampus. The odd take on this anthology film is that the stories cut back and forth between each other. One doesn’t finish, and the next begins, etc. But it works. And the big finale (spoiler) is Santa fighting Krampus at the north pole. Totally worth the price of admission.
I think Krampus is here to say. And no matter what the next cinematic outing for the big guy might be, you know what he really needs? A theme song. Like I said, “The Krampus Comes Out Tonight” is available on iTunes. And Bandcamp. And Amazon music. I’m just sayin’.
Merry Krampus, everyone.